“BAD” girl!

In Mario Vargas Llosa’s book, The Bad Girl, the force of man’s love for a extremely free-spirited woman never expires. Lily in their home country Peru captivated the main character Ricardo. Ricardo always remembers Lily for being an awesome dancer, and an intriguing person. He knew that it was not just her simple beauty but also something about chasing her, made him love her more and more.

Since the beginning of the book, the character of Lily was not innocent. Lily lied to him by saying she was from Chile, she was ashamed of being a poor girl in Peru. Well years later pass, and Ricardo was working as translator in Paris. To his surprise and happiness, he encounters Lily in Paris. But Lily had changed her name. They were able to have a short-lived relationship that was halted by her work. Ricardo advised her to put her work first and he will wait for her return to Paris. Some years later pass by, and this time she is back. Now the Peruvian girl is back as a married woman. She married a rich European guy that provides her money and therefore she stopped working.

Even though, there was a repetitive cycle, the book was not easy to put down. I had to keep reading to know what Ricardo will do every time the ‘Bad girl’ would come back to him. She for sure made clear that she was after money; love was not something she was looking for. Ricardo tried to prove her wrong, and all time she failed him by tossing him aside.

In class, we discussed the title and the meaning that it sends to people. True, Llosa did put this title to classify some women. What kind of women? For sure, the girl was not a submissive, simple, or a traditional kind of woman. She was doing whatever she wanted with her life. She was going to be independent when she wanted or she was going to get married to whomever she wanted. The flaw she had was that she did not want to love. Since she did not want to be emotional, she was “bad” and -well she had to suffer at some point in her life.

-RA

Cooking and Love!

Now reading the book of Esquivel, Como Agua Para Chocolate, gives great insight as to why the movie was made; to show the passion of Tita and her lover, Pedro. Tradition still is the basis to the book and the movie. The book uses food recipes that have been in a family for many decades to tell a forbidden love story. However, the main purpose is the realization of the young women and breaks the tradition that is limiting their lives.

The story starts with a single mother with 3 girls that were of marrying age. The option of love for the youngest girl, Tita, was not one. The Mother had decided that Tita would live to serve her until she dies. Pedro was in love with Tita, but had to marry her older sister. The two lovers could not enjoy their love in the eyes of society. The mother had a lot of influence over her daughters. Doña Elena had already decided the lives to be lived by her daughters. Except that, Tita had other plans in her mind for herself.

The book loads itself in a traditional history of Mexico. Knowing and hearing the typical life of the old revolutionary times for Mexican women can be boring. Yet realizing how far along in society women have come can be an awakening to most. In a sense, the ‘American’ women might have been more outspoken sooner than Mexican women might have been in the past. ‘A way to get to a man’s heart is through his stomach’, Tita certainly proved this old saying to be true. The story told in this movie, desires to illustrate that step of independence for Mexican women.

-RA

Dopamine- addictive?

Does Love exist? Does it…??? And if it does how can you tell if it’s real love? From this movie we can get ideas as to why we can think and feel love. They did a pretty good job at presenting some situations that most can experience. The one night stand is something that is becoming more common among young people. The simplicity of intercourse with others is now more accepted with a growing number of people. To the public, sex is now just sex. Before the notion of making love was of being intimate with someone you were in love.

Now to understand real love and know how to recognize it can be the tricky part. The beginning will be the known attraction of course that two people have then is interacting with each other. Other biological steps follow like sensors, hormones, reactions that happen through the senses of sight and smell- reactions detected in the brain, neurons, substances release and blah blah  blah…

The movie wanted to reinforced that, it has been scientifically proved that there are certain sensory- chemical reactions that have to happen to know there are the feelings of love. Now knowing cannot be easily understood- if some people do not even understand themselves how are they to identify love? No matter what-> ‘One for sure will know’ if they are in love. Then follows the bigger question to ponder- if True Love exists? What to do? On this one personally I will be more pessimistic, pretty much now I don’t think that it does. Even the main character had that thinking- well he had just mostly questions/ doubts that needed answers. Surely, questioning can be also understood as a pessimistic attitude- right?

One conclusion the movie has, is that we have to accept that love does not have to last forever. But being content with a person that will understand your needs and being able to live together can be sufficient for two people. Almost everyone knows that love is not easy to find it. For me, I can only hope to recognize real love….It seems that the movie ended with a more conformist view of love.

-RA

For a Million Dollars- What is Love?

What is love? It has always been a common question. We as humans long for a significant other. Being lonely is not a great option to be in life. But the trick is- knowing what or who to look for in this life to share the rest of your life. When I was little girl, wanting or liking a boy was nice. It was nice to think another boy was really cute, funny, and kind. Wow all the butterflies in the stomach one gets when knowing about spending time or that first kiss with the boy. When I thought of my first kiss, I wanted it to be with someone I really had ‘feelings’ for and well someone who was going to have a relationship with for a long time. Later in my teen years, my first kiss was a sloppy one and the boyfriend only lasted a month! Still none-the-less it is simply nice to think with that innocence and perfection. There are relationships where a couple were each others ‘first’ in all senses and have been together for all their lives. While many other people have other stories to tell that are not of love lasting a life time.

For most finding that special someone is a main goal in life. Personally, just living my life and enjoying it in all sense is not that bad at all. Love can be experience through many people in your life. Of course a romantic love is not the same as love of a family or a friend. Usually I would know people that being without a girlfriend or a boyfriend was a bad and depressing time for them. The romantic slow songs always talk about how much love exists, needing one another, missing someone, and even hurting. For sure there is a lot involve in loving; a lot of emotions and even effort. The phrase of ‘the other half’ is used to address the people in a relationship. For most the ‘love of their life’ means having someone in their lives that completes them. The senses of needing, depending, and I guess the company more than anything means to love someone.

Lately I have been more aware of people who seem to be totally ok; going through their youth and later years without having someone by their side. It is rare to talk about not wanting to marry or even have a relationship. I think knowing what love is or being ‘in loving’ with someone does entail many aspects of emotions and decisions. It sure helps if one knows oneself, knows what one wants in life, and/or a purpose. Now and again, I see people who tend to ‘love’ someone that tells them what to do in life. Or some just ‘love’ someone who is just attractive and don’t really care about their personality or attitudes in life. It has been interesting to ponder the question of ‘what is love?’, because even I have noticed how my own answers have changed. Love does not signify having a simple attraction to looks or being an insincere relationship. I know that love does involve some physical attraction, then understanding, and also varied emotions. Love can be about adjusting to their company, complementing each other, and knowing that not everything is perfect all the time. That many experiences could be shared and be used to grow as better people.

-RA

Accepting or negotiating time?

When we address the diverse issues of feminine beauty, wow are we in for a long haul… On the Monday night panel, discussion over the art of Miwa Yanagi 3 different photograph series was overall very interesting. Each panelist was interpreting and adding their own views about her art and women beauty. Everyone seemed to love the series of ‘my grandmothers’ and with great reason; each photograph presents a different issue of life to all women. To ask your subjects, to imagine their life in the future, wow! The strong one that is memorable: Yuka. She is a very adventurous old lady, she rides with her way younger man, her red hair in the wind, and have just a blast! Who would think of an old lady, a grandmother to be this active and full of life and control?

We need to really wake up and get past the young and thin beauty that Hollywood and the media keep pronouncing every day. From the image of the commercialize feminine beauty the great majority of women idolize being young, being thin, and just you typical flirty ‘kind of gal’. It is true what the one panelist said, that by conforming to the proverbial image of perfection of beauty, then society will praise the effort and accomplishment in being ‘beautiful’.

The one concept that really caught my attention, not only because it was the last presentation, but because it was about Japanese not conforming to what society expects of all women. Japanese women are to be mothers, produce more beings to keep the economy going. But instead they are ‘Parasites’ who are single women who choose not to marry or have kids. These single women do splurge on whatever they want for themselves, so in turn they are considered ‘selfish’. Being selfish is not a very bad term; they can accept who they are for themselves. Does not sound like a bad philosophy at all to me. Maybe someday we will have more minds for women to be selfish and not conform to what society desires. Aging is a natural process for all humans, but for women is a process that most will dread. But someday, with hope some may embrace and enjoy the wisdom of life that comes with aging.

-RA

La Nueva Mestiza en los U.S. of A

Just a few thoughts on the writing of Gloria Anzaldua’s Borderlands, la Frontera- the New Mestiza:

When first reading, I could sense the strength and passion of the writer. There was one repetative image that struck me, and I learned about was el Cuatlicue, a goddess; lady of the serpent. She explains the meaning of the goddess is the creator, the mother of the earth, responsible for fertility and the beautiful days. The goddess helps her identify the importance of knowing ones culture, and the beginnings of her blood, her family. By reading the book With her machete in her hand by Catriona Rueda Esquibel, I learned that Gloria was a Chicana lesbian writer. Just knowing some more detail information about Anzaldua, it made think even more about being a woman in the U.S. Gloria does not only live in a world where being brown is looked down on, but being a woman and a lesbian that just adds more prejudices.

She had to look into her history and herself to find that strong individual. Her history begins many centuries ago, miles and miles away, but nonetheless it is her history as well as of other Chicana women that are living in the U.S. today. By one not denying who they are, one can be complete- instead of becoming what the white man has tried to conditioned most people to be according to their race. We have to gain knowledge, find value, and become whole and strong. The languages are important, because she had to know English and Spanish well. In reality accents matter to everyone in either language. Being raised speaking Spanish and learning English can be confusing to most. People will criticize, meaning that one has to be perfect in either language.

Dealing with different cultures is a constant living for most mestizos in the U.S. Knowing how to balance each world, or each culture, or just simply represent yourself no matter where you are at then well that is accepting and teaching the world at the same time. This is where most Chicanos loose themselves; loose their history, their culture. Choosing the white culture, and not the mestizo or the Mexican culture well then you just lost you.

-RA

Madres e hijas latinas!

 

In today’s views of relationships, by now seems that we all know they take effort. A specific relationship that I am referring to is the mother-daughter in the Latino culture. From personal experience, my mother has shaped some or maybe even most of my views of life. It does not always happen that the mother shapes any of the ways of their daughter’s life. When I talked to my professor about the writing for the Latino Sexuality project, our conversation went over some issues that Latina women can face living in the U.S.

There are special bonds in life, and one that I can truly relate is the bond that I have with my mother. From the conversation we discussed how a mother can be matriarch of the house for better or for worse of the family. We talked about one situation of a family where the mother was single with two girls. The two girls grew up to be completely different. One daughter very conservative and reserved covered up with her clothing and the other very flirty and well she became a stripper. How different the two young women from the same house, the one that became the stripper was closer to her mother, the other that was very reserve was not. The single mother did bring different guys to her house. So one conservative girl seemed that she had be what her mother was not.

A lot of the writing that I will do, could be in comparison to my own experience and learning to what is perceive about Latina women when it comes to dealing with control over their daughters. There in the end I have narrowed my project to exploring the saying or thoughts that happen in Latino homes, ‘if you’re not home you’re having sex.’ This thoughts or sayings go back to a young Latina living at home with her parents, and what issues can arise if she is not at home. Being at home to most parents deals with control and knowing how she is doing. In this project, I can explore the influence of the bond of the mother-daughter relationship and how the daughter will react to the control from her home.

 

-RA